Awolowo’s Jewel and Nigerian wives

With the myriad of issues that are daily thrown up in our country and on the global scene, a writer or weekly columnist is often confronted with a dilemma. He’s usually faced with the difficult choice of which issue of public importance to write on or discuss with his readers. And his case is not helped by a politically-charged environment like ours where so many news and current affairs issues daily call for attention. Such was the situation I found myself in in the last one week!

And the issues were many: The yet-to-be-sorted out fuel crises in the country; the ongoing debacle in Kogi state around the gubernatorial elections following the sudden and shocking death of Abubakar Audu, the APC flag-bearer in the election; the burial of the late Mama Hannah Idowu Dideolu Awolowo, wife of the late nationalist and one of our country’s founding fathers, Chief Obafemi Awolowo; agitations for Biafra; the probe of former National Security Adviser, Col. Sambo Dasuki (rtd) and the corruption allegations against him in relation to security budget and expenses under his watch; and the growing impatience among citizens that the Buhari government is not giving enough priority and urgency to delivering the change Nigerians are waiting for especially in the area of fixing the economy.

However, I am focusing on the life of the late HID Awolowo whom her husband proudly called his ‘Jewel of Inestimable Value’ but whom I call ‘the mother of the nation.’

To start with, I believe every man, every leader, who will do great things in life, needs a loyal wife who will always be his pillar of support at home, and remain true, loyal, faithful and committed to him in their marriage since it’s a lifetime journey full of ups and downs, trials and triumphs and unexpected twists and turns. For Awolowo, it’s obvious HID was such!

Born on November 25, 1915, HID got married to Awolowo on December 26, 1937. She was 22 years at the time. Her husband was 28. In her heydays, she was a successful business woman and even set a record as the first to import lace materials and other textiles into Nigeria. Of course, she also played an active role in her husband’s legendary political career.

For instance, she stood in for Awolowo in the alliance formed between the NCNC and the AG, called the United Progressive Grand Alliance (UPGA), while he was tried and in jail. The plans were that she would contest the elections, and if she won, would step down for her husband in a by-election.

Towards supporting her husband to fulfill his dream of becoming Nigeria’s President in the Second Republic, HID toured the length and breadth of the country with Awolowo and other party leaders campaigning. She also coordinated the women’s wing of the party and was always present at all party caucuses. In spite of all these, she effectively managed her home and family.

When she was buried beside her husband at their country home in Ikenne Remo on November 25 on a day she would have clocked 100 years,Channels Television, in its reportage, said the burial was the highest gathering of politicians and leaders in the country so far this year. Judging by the number of leaders led by President Muhammadu Buhari, who joined the two surviving children of the deceased, Reverend (Mrs.) Tola Oyediran and Mrs. Tokunbo Awolowo-Dosunmu, a former Nigerian Ambassador to the Netherlands, the grandchildren and the entire Awolowo family, in paying their last respects and bidding farewell to their matriarch, this conclusion was very apt.

Other notable leaders at the burial were the son-in-law to the deceased and Vice-President, Prof. Yemi Osinbajo; his wife, Dolapo; Senate President Bukola Saraki, Former President, Chief Olusegun Obasanjo; his wife, Bola; Head of the defunct Interim National Government, Chief Ernest Shonekan; a former Head of State, Gen. Yakubu Gowon; and his wife, Victoria. The National Leader of the APC, Asiwaju Bola Tinubu; Industrialist and Africa’s richest man, Aliko Dangote, 16 state governors, serving ministers, current and former senators and no less than 36 bishops from the Anglican Communion and other religious leaders were also in attendance.

With such impressive roll call of our country’s crème de la crème, I doubt if there’s any other burial that will attract such high-profile attendance with just one month to go in 2015.

But that’s just an aside. Nigeria remains a clime where many prominent leaders live, die and are buried without the nation really making any serious attempt at critically examining their lives with the aim of drawing out lessons that will help the living and the unborn generations. Ours is also a country where the culture of sharing experiences, through personal life stories documented in autobiographies and biographies, still has a long way to go. In the myriad of issues currently confronting Nigeria, I believe there are lessons from HID’s life which should not be missed especially by our women and wives!

But first, let me make a confession. If there is ever any regret I have in my media career so far, it is in not being able to make the much-intentioned visit I had wanted to make to Ikenne to simply go and greet this great woman and matriarch of the Awolowo Family before her death. And I’m someone who hardly regrets his decisions. For every decision taken, I try my best to think it through, put it in prayers, and make up my mind to live with the consequences of such decision.

However, the challenges and pressures of work aside other commitments ensured that I shifted the trip and procrastinated until the sad news of her death was announced to the nation on September 19. Her death was thus a personal loss for me. And so, although we never met one-on-one, and I also wasn’t able to attend her burial last Wednesday, I know I owe her this tribute.  It’s the minimum I can do in honour of this virtuous, courageous, enterprising and great woman who was in a world of her own, a wonderful companion to her husband, a shining example of a wife, a Godly mother, a true icon among the women leaders Nigeria has had, and perhaps the best First Lady Nigeria never had!

Most Revd. Nicholas Okoh, the Archbishop, Metropolitan and Primate of the Anglican Communion, while extolling the virtues of the deceased during her funeral service at Our Saviour’s Anglican Church in Ikenne where HID was the Iya Ijo, described her as someone who was dedicated and served God till the end. The bishop noted that not many men of Awolowo’s status could describe their wives in glowing terms the way the late sage did. I agree.

Okoh further urged spinsters and young married women to see the late matriarch as a role model in shaping their family lives. I also agree.

There is no disputing the fact that HID Awolowo contributed immensely to the greatness of her husband, who is widely admired as the most visionary politician our country has yet produced with the impact of his party, the Action Group (AG), in the years leading to Nigeria’s independence in 1960 and even the years after independence through the Unity Party of Nigeria (UPN) especially in the areas of education and infrastructure.

So many vicissitudes of life confronted her family yet she remained undaunted. HID was heartbroken countless times, yet, she soldiered on. Till her death, she remained a woman of prayer. That she lived to the ripe age of 99 is truly remarkable.  She wasn’t known to be garrulous. She was decorous. These are virtues Nigerian women, our wives and sisters can emulate.

HID had five biological children, Segun Awolowo, Tola Oyediran, Oluwole Awolowo, Ayodele Soyode and Tokunbo Awolowo-Dosunmu. But she suffered the devastating fate of losing three of them (Segun, Oluwole, and Ayodele) during her lifetime.

Now, losing a child, even a pregnancy, is not a palatable experience for any couple. All parents, no matter how long they live, look forward to being buried by their children in old age. But during her lifetime, HID had the misfortune of losing three grown-ups. It’s an experience no woman anywhere on the face of the earth wants to ever have. Any Nigerian woman would say ‘I reject it.’ It’s not my portion.’ But such was HID’s lot!

However, she refused to be overwhelmed by grief. She calmly bore the experience and was not recorded to have ever questioned God in it all. Perhaps her consistent calmness in the face of storms of life, many of them unexpected, had something to do with her strong Christian faith. Whatever it was, she remained strong till the very end. That’s courage.

As humans, at some points in our lives, as we pursue our careers and aspirations, as we commit to building our families and giving them the best of living, as we aim to grow our businesses and expand our conglomerates, as we live our dreams and strive to make our country and world a better place, we will encounter challenges, disappointments, trials, betrayals, deaths, and so many unexpected occurrences. To overcome, we need faith, courage and a resilient spirit that never gives up hope. Awolowo, during his lifetime, often said ‘it is not life that matters but the courage you bring into it.’ His jewel was an embodiment of this wise saying.

Running a media business is not an easy venture anywhere. The Nigerian environment with dwindling sales and advertising revenue coupled with increasing running costs, further compounds it.  In spite of these challenges however, HID did her best, as a good wife, to ensure that she kept the legacy of her husband alive. She saw to it that Tribune Newspapers, which her husband founded in 1949, remained afloat and even got stronger.

Nigerian women and wives must therefore understand that most husbands will not shower such encomiums or flattering adulation to their wives in public like Awolowo did when he described her as his jewel of inestimable value if it wasn’t earned. There are women today who will die and their husbands will sigh in relief. And of course, there are husbands who will pass on today and their wives will be glad they did only that they won’t show it publicly.

That’s the main reason why every couple must strive to be the best they can be to each other and also make the best of their marriage and family no matter the challenges life brings.

Just as John wrote in the fourteenth chapter of the book of Revelations,“Then I heard a voice from heaven saying to me, “Write: ‘Blessed are the dead who die in the Lord from now on.'” “Yes,” says the Spirit, “that they may rest from their labours, and their works follow them,” I believe Mama HID Awolowo has gone to her rest and her good works will continue to be recounted. She fought a good fight, finished her race and kept the faith.

Of a fact, HID Awolowo was an uncommon woman. She was truly a jewel, a jewel of inestimable value. And her life should serve as a model to Nigerian wives who want to see their husbands succeed in their areas of calling. The Awolowo name has already assumed the status of a badge of honour in Nigerian politics and leadership today. The patriarch and the matriarch of the family made it so. I expect the children, grandchildren and the entire Awolowo family in their various endeavours to continue this legacy and keep the flag flying. May her great soul rest in peace.

Kolawole, a Red-Ribbon award-winning journalist and biographer, is publisher/CEO of Posterity Media, a Nigerian publishing company based in Lagos. You can follow him on twitter:  @ofemigan