Deal with it; go forward

YouNow is created for the everyday individual who seeks to gain a deeper understanding of Self in order to achieve their highest potential, while staying true to their essence. These write-ups are designed to help you become more conscious and deliberate in your interactions and day-to-day living

Goodbyes are difficult. A poet once wrote, ‘the most painful goodbyes are the ones never said, never explained’

In every situation you go through in life, (and you will go through a lot) there will be good times, bad times and downright ugly times. There will even be times when you can’t explain exactly what you’re going through! These are the times you have to decide by yourself, ‘How do I move beyond this?

It has to be a conscious decision.

The challenge with most of us is that when we go through certain situations, we tend to avoid or literally run away from our truth. We don’t deal with our issues, and go through whatever emotions or challenges we are faced with. We mostly hide behind the façade of ‘I’ll be fine,’ ‘It is well,’ or ‘things will get better.’ What happens afterwards is,we never quite grow. We become non-committal, and tend to shy away from confrontations or challenges.

These situations are meant to strengthen us. We are supposed to go through our pain, and allow ourselves to heal. People who have gone through emotional abuse for instance sometimes feel its business as usual. They say things like ‘It’s not a big deal, I’ll just move on.’ These people have not accepted what they’ve gone through, and acceptance is the first step to recovery.

“How did I feel in this situation? These are the emotions I’m going through right now. Label them; I’m feeling shame, anger, and disgust. What made me feel that way? It is because this person said this and that.

Go through your emotions and pain. Do not be afraid to recognize and acknowledge how you feel. In going through, you come out a more consciousand wholesome person.

We finally laid my immediate older brother to rest last week. Tough as it was, I kept reminding myself to be present and allow myself feel and get through the emotions.  Ignoring the “Don’t’ cry’; ‘Don’t speak’ ‘Do this’; ‘Do that’.

He who decides to ‘feel’ will gain understanding and clarity.

There are fears and there are goals; one holds us back, the other pushes us forward.

Admit your internal aching; Deal with it; Go forward.

Remember Freedom is Peace; Optimism is Nature; Action is always within reach. BE MORE!

If you found this article relatable, let me know what you think in the comments. Do you want to live more intentionally and develop your gifts/talents for maximum impact? Feel free to reach me via email: [email protected]. You can also connect with me via;

Instagram @identitycoach

Twitter @identitycoach1

Facebook @YBBidentitycoach

I look forward to hearing from you.

Yetunde Bankole-Bernard is ‘The identity Coach™”

Certified as an Image Consultant, Human connection and Personality type practitioner and Work place psychologist.