I was also bullied

I do not think there is any Nigerian who has passed thru the Boarding system that did not go through this phase if we are going to be truthful to ourselves.

Bullying is a passage that most boys will go through and I dare say nothing we can do to stop it.

In my secondary school in Command Ipaja, we had plenty.  We called it fagging and the school authorities would say, ‘No fagging’ but that one was their own.

We have to understand this sub culture to attack it and kill it. It is a coming of age thing. If you can withstand the beating and wickedness you were a don.

In Command, we had all sorts of names for people who went through bullying.  Bullying and came out strong. We called them ‘maye’, ‘godosmen’ and ‘You na Kura’.

In fact when the principal called you up on stage and flogs you with the double-mouthed koboko and you didn’t flinch the whole school would scream Maye as you walked past.

I remember one night when two teachers caught me. One had asked me to go give a junior girl food that he had cooked in his house and I looked at the mumu.

Maye, like me, to go give junior girl food? Was he shagging her, possibly because why would he send me on such errand?

I ate the food and threw away the plates in the thick Ipaja forest. From that moment, I knew I was a marked man. I knew what was coming and I waited for the day.

It came. It was lights out and they entered my dormitory. Two of them, I remeber them very well, the Biology teacher and his mate the PE one and they abducted me and took me towards the classrooms.

I still remember the punishment like yesterday. One held my two hands and there was a huge pillar in between my hands and the other beat the living daylight out of me.

When they finished, my head was swollen. It was as if they put a big stick by the side of my head as it stuck out.

I walked in pain and bleeding to the dormitory where my boys were waiting. They knew what had happened and would not ask because they knew I will not talk. I was a Maye and a Kura.

If I spoke I would be dammed and be labelled a ‘bolo’ and what you never want to be called in Command was a ‘Bolo’.

So the culture is entrenched and endemic. No matter the wailing it is there.

What we need now is a complete overhaul of our attitudes, mobilizing agents of social influence from religious institutions down to even village traditional seats.

A system that hero-worships the one that can take the greatest number of strokes or the one that is the best boxer and can punch for 24 hours non stop has turned into an enduring sub culture that can not be eroded by mere wailing on social media

Everybody is at fault here. From the Government, to the parents even more so, to the school authorities and down to society and the culture that governs us.

When things like these happen, we are quick to detach and hurl blames when in itself we are entrenched deep in the folly.

If domestics want to start telling their stories, we will be ashamed.  What they face on our homes is one thousand times worse

So my people, let this sad tale be a true awakening. A clarion call for the dismemberment if this wicket sub culture and the enthronement of reforms across the value chain with the hope that we can finally take a breather in this country.

God receive Sylvester’s innocent soul. He has give his life so that we can attempt to be a better people.