“My blood pumped hard and my heart beat quickened. I snatched a bottle of water from the side walk and gulped it down in a flash. The beats of sweat had climax into a free flowing stream on my face. I wiped my fingers across my forehead to sweep off the torrents. I replaced the head band and quickened my pace. As I rounded the bend, not two but three athletes were ahead. The words of my coach ran through my being in a feverish frenzy.
“You must have a superior hunger that desires only gold. If you feed your appetite with alternatives, you will miss it all together. Do not look at others; focus on the best time to beat and crossing the finishing line. It’s your duty to unlock the winner in you. And it is never entirely a game of strength, but a commitment that requires the willpower to win. There are always the professional muscles of experience that push you ahead, but pray that “time” and “chance” happen in your favour.” I sprang, passed the third athletes.
And then the pain from my left knee resumed. The tears welled up in my eyes as I see the other two runners far ahead.. I glanced at my time and I was a few seconds ahead of the last record. But that was not the gold! Then suddenly the first athlete went down. I continued to run as it’s the discipline. I saw the finishing line dancing in the wind. I pushed forward clenching my teeth. I got head to head with the athlete ahead. I saw the glance but kept mine straight, embracing the gold, just a few split seconds with the final thrust.
And the Winner is……… Who is the winner? The winner is a passionate, hardworking, competent, confident, teachable, positive and God fearing woman; whose imagination is devoid of barriers or limitations. She is a woman who had challenges but surmounted them, creating a tested recipe which other women can rely on. Women have peculiar challenges which cannot be ignored. It is not about “gender inferiority” but a “difference” which makes our needs and challenges peculiar. Some of the challenges women face include:
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Fear of Failure | Poor Appetite for Risk | Socio-Cultural Beliefs | Physical Challenges | Abuse – Domestic| Sexual Harassment |Emotional Abuse | Financial Difficulties | Inadequate Professional Qualification | Health | Early Widowhood | Single Motherhood | Poor Exposure | Balancing Family and Career | After-War-Survival and many others.
One of the reasons women seem rooted on the spot is the common narratives and destructive mindsets entrenched in our belief system. The stereotypes that women always stalk women; and men do not support the growth of women created a victim mentality.
The Sheryl Sanberg theory of “And” tears down the barrier of “either –Or” , “Nether-Nor”. It destroys the limiting factors and presents the reassurance that you can achieve everything you set your mind on. However, you have the responsibility to make a mind shift, create your own reality, design your path and determine the paces.
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Embrace Challenges, Share Your Story
If you must engage and be engaged, you must be willing to let down your guards. You must become vulnerable. You must embrace your challenges as part of your own uniqueness and as a raw stone on which you can hew the steps of opportunity that take you into your success. You must be willing to share your success stories and your failures. This is not about tearing down your self-worth but owning up to your weakness in such a way that you become more receptive to learning. It helps to create a learning board on which others draw their pathways, minding the curves of failure you have shown.
Mentor-Mentee Network : Face it, Phase It
You must ask how best to overcome the challenges you are facing, and this must be by engaging with women or men who have faced similar challenges. There may not be a single solution to all similar issues, but there are inferences that can be drawn from the experience of others. Experienced women and men who have been there owe upcoming women climbing the rung the responsibility of shining the light down the alley so that it’s easier for them to thread their way carefully to success. If you are up-coming, look out for mentors who can help. The major anchor on which engagement takes its strength is in constant communication, pointing at educated choices, which can be sustained by a formal or informal Mentor-Mentee Relationship.
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A Trust and Fort
Whatever leadership role or space of influence presented by timeless professionalism or by mere opportunity, know that you hold this position in “Trust” for other women. You must preserve it by create an army of performance driven females who can hold the reins and recreate the success story. You must restrain from dwelling on the imperfection of the female clan. You have the opportunity to create the new tribe you desire to see
Be Empowerment
It’s not just financially but emotionally, professional and in every area of life. Be empowered means “Be Prepared”. You must be informed and take actions on the information at your disposal.
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Be Happy to Fail
Failure is very essential for a complete story of triumph otherwise, you do not have a dust from where the crown was found. Failure keeps you humble and reminds you of your human nature. It is an opportunity to re-strategize and a blessing to help others navigate their way. When you fail, don’t stand there, just keep walking, keep moving, that is the only way to complete the journey and succeed at it.
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Re-Invent Yourself
Yes, hard as it may sound, an engineer can go back to school and pursue a medical degree, if that’s the new challenge that can give her fulfillment. Although changing career across unrelated direction may slow down your establishment, a well calculated move to accommodate other passion as you progress in your career is not bad in itself. If you tired of doing what you are doing, and want to pursue a new passion, please go for it. It helps flexibility towards new reality of your situation.
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Be Part of a Support Network
Engaging includes forming female circles, professional groups, support systems that understand, appreciate and proffer solutions to some of the numerous challenges. Women can engage for professional growth or Personal development. Everyone gets to a point where you start to measure your performance by how much life you have affected. Life is about taking and giving back, hence the need to find a platform where you can influence and affect life. Every platform has its agenda, value system and beliefs. Look for a selfless platform that resonates with what you plan to achieve and offer yourself as a volunteer in any capacity you can function. Be Bold for Change; Find your Voice and Voice out; “Feel Good”, “Do Great ”. Inspire Women to Aspire, and when they get to there, Celebrate. And Remember, Don’t be Perfect, Be Genuine.
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1 comments
Valid write up ma. Happy women’s dau