Man U signing of Romelu Lukaku — good value for £100m?

By Baba Grumpy

The deal is done. Lukaku is going to Old Trafford for £100m. United are obviously happy. There are no insinuations that Mino Raiola has put a gun to either of Ed Woodward or Jose Mourinho’s head, forcing them to cough up this gargantuan sum for the Belgian. Knowing that Mr. Bill Kenwright is a complete gentleman, there is no suggestion he will indulge in such underhanded business method either. However, I cannot vouch for any other member of the Everton Board. Moshi Monsters can do anything I have been told.

Everton has done well out of the deal. Guaranteed £75m for a player that they splashed out £24m for 3 years ago. To triple your money in 36 monthsis a wonderful achievement. You might wonder how they will replace his goals and push on if they desire to break the Top 4 / Top 6 Holy Grail.

I think standing still will be a doodle for Everton. Finishing 7^th shouldn’t be too much trouble with or without Lukaku. With a bit more effort Tony Pulis’ West Brom could have made 6^th last season. Not that there is too much difference between the manager who finished 6^th and Tony Pulis. I dare echo a friend on social media who recently said if you gave Tony Pulis £200m transfer kitty; he will do better than 6^th in the Premier League.

Anyway, we might never know as Tony Pulis might now be setting his sights way beyond a team that perennially finishes outside of the Top 4 and can’t win or challenge for any major trophies anymore.

You can bet all United fans are looking back on the Fergie years with some erotic longing. Wake Up ManU fans. Fergie is gone for good. Maybe if you turned Old Trafford into a dog or horseracing track, he will come back. Just maybe.

So Everton is cool. Lukaku should be ok too. He said he couldn’t say no if the best club in the world came in for him. But I didn’t realize Barcelona or Real Madrid wanted to sign him. J

United can spend shedloads on Lukaku’s wages. They’ve just freed £250k on Rooney’s wages and are likely to free even more on Zlatan’s telephone number wages too. So Lukaku is guaranteed good terms on a 5-year contract while Raiola is sorted whether Lukaku stayed at Everton, Leave for Chelsea or sign for Manchester United.

Interesting that ManU are now the club that appears to be the finishing school for prized football ponies from the Raiola stable. Raiola is sorted. He is the worm that needs feeding before you can eat satisfy yourself. And you can’t dislodge this parasite through the craphole without taking some bitter medicine.

Now what is United buying?

Amazing stats:

• One of only 5 players to score 50 Premier League goals before their 23rd birthday.
• Goals to game ratio of 1 to 2. Up there with what is considered top class
• He is young and many consider there is more to come from him.

All well and good and makes for maybe some excitement if you are a United fan. The club is demonstrating its ambition by splashing out in the transfer market. It has bought something of a well-regarded young talent and in the process shifted a dead wood of a legend on big salaries out of the club.

But wait a minute. What is the underlying basis for the excitement and perception that the Lukaku signing will bode well for United? Is United going to sign a new Manager? Is Lukaku better than Zlatan? Are there planned changes in the midfield or style of play? Will the defence strengthen? Is there any currency to the grumblings that the manager is past his prime?

Man United wants to be back winning the big trophies but is Lukaku the right player to bring back GLORY GLORY? Is Lukaku the right choice for a club with very big and massive ambition?

As a fan, if you had a choice between Robert Lewandoski, Cristiano Ronaldo, Gareth Bale, Antoine Griezmann, Luis Suarez, Pierre Emerick Aubameyang, Diego Costa, Sergio Aguero and Romelu Lukaku. Will you be spending £100m on the Belgian?

Is the underlying problem the fact that none of these big name monsters of a striker do not want to play for a toxic manager in Jose Mourinho and a club fast heading nowhere like Man United?

Lukaku is a massive climb down for a club that has ambition. Everton actually thought he was at their level and they could keep him. Chelsea half-heartedly pursued him and deliberately pissed of Raiola so they won’t get him and can boldly assure Antonio Conte that ‘we tried but he didn’t want to come’. Funny how in a one horse race, United outbid themselves.

Is Lukaku worth a £100m? Other clubs have done deals; Arsenal has bought Lacazette for half the price of Lukaku. Is the French man half the talent of Romelu? Griezmann was meant to come for £100m. Is Griezmann at par with Lukaku? I understand valuations have gone haywire recently but £100m for Lukaku does appear much. However it’s a willing buyer and willing seller market even if the buyer is being fleeced and has a few in house moles eager to do deals with their super agents of choice. I suppose PLCs are a bit like that. It is nobody’s money at the end of the day.

If you go down the route that there is a shortage of strikers and that’s why the available ones cost an arm and a leg and a few bungs. Why then is that cold baby faced assassin being trifled with. I am sorry to say, Marcus Rashford is better than Lukaku. He cost £100m less and will gladly play for Manchester United for free. Going by the Lukaku valuation, young Marcus must be worth at least £60m. Maybe if he is represented by Raiola or Mendes and playing in some back water somewhere, he will be heading to United now as the saviour. Unfortunately the not so Special One has plunked him on the wings. First to satisfy Zlatan’s massive ego and now to help improve Lukaku’s atrocious first touch.

£100m – ‘ya avin a laff’

Hey Jose. Don’t worry. JUST SPLASH IT. YOLO. Money is not United’s problem. Please don’t forget, you’ve got defensive problems and a few holes in midfield, Arsenal have a few players they are looking to sell. Good players, serial FA cup winners. They know how to win things. Spread some of the joy their way please.

Baba Grumpy works in financial services in the United Kingdom. He blogs mostly about football at http://babagrumpy.blogspot.co.uk. His Twitter handle is @BabaGrumpy