The Nigerian FARCEball Federation

By Baba Grumpy

I was delighted to attend the Nigeria v Senegal match at The Hive on Thursday. It was the 3rd Nigerian match I was attending, the previous two at Craven Cottage, football grounds of Fulham FC. Both previous matches were decent football outings. I particularly enjoyed the match versus Italy. The Nigerian defence pitted its guile against Prime Balottelli and totally distinguished themselves. 

When I heard whisperings of this week’s Super Eagles friendly, I was thrilled we were finally organizing a friendly during the international break. Senegal and Burkina Faso are decent teams, friendlies in Europe make more sense as the transport / travel & logistics expenses for the NFF is probably lower given the bulk of the expenses should be on the boys. I hope but I am sure there are some creative football administrators out there who might be willing to persuade me otherwise.

In the months/weeks leading up to the match itself the publicity was pathetic. The communication from the NFF was scandalous. They must be specialists at Ghost Whisperings. A series of ‘we are planning two friendlies in London’, very little information on opponents, venues, ticket pricing, ticket outlets etc.

The information was only provided a few weeks to the event in a country where people are already planning their ski trips for next winter. In a country where the France v England match taking place on June 13, 2017 in Paris was announced in September 2016 and you can already buy tickets for that match now.

What is the problem of the NFF? The same problems with Nigeria? Why is arranging friendlies such a difficult job? There are FIFA mandated international breaks in the football calendar every season. CAF fixtures are well known in advance. If we don’t have World Cup or AFCON qualifying matches, Nigeria should be having a friendly during every international break. Simple. Pleading lack of funding is lame. Football is big business. Well organized / properly organized high profile social events by Nigerians always sell out. NFF THINK DON’T BE THICK.

To be fair and attempting some balance, after the AFCON win when the NFF administrators (current and past) treated Stephen Keshi badly and were inept in their appointment of a misfit in Sunday Oliseh, it looks like we are finally getting the football side of things right. Long may that continue.

Despite this positive, I think we should be having more commercially viable and commercially self funding friendlies and more prestige friendlies versus top tier countries if we can be a bit more organized. There are documented Nigerians all over Europe. Enough to sell out any stadium the size of The Hive in Barnet if only our NFF football administrators can get their acts together.

Six years ago, I was at Wembley to watch Ghana play England. I was jealous. Asamoah Gyan and his generation of the Black Stars playing in front of 90,000 football fans in the home of football. Ghana in all its glory and colorful splendor beautifying Wembley.

When is the NFF planning to play England again at Wembley? Ask each and every one of your players what it will mean to them to play at an iconic stadium? Ask us the fans if we want to watch the Super Eagles at these big name stadiums? There are historical links between our countries and many European countries that can be exploited to arrange high profile friendlies if only our administrators will put on a thinking cap rather than carry a begging bowl.

If only they can plan a bit more long term, do serious background work and develop a reputation for reliability. I believe the England FA will seriously consider playing a friendly against the Super Eagles as long as they are certain we will not pull out of the match at the last minute after they have sold 90,000 tickets.

Back to the Senegal friendly on Thursday. I was scandalized. Nigeria was playing in England at a location that was suitable for Londoners and people living in the Midlands and less than 3,000 fans turned up in a country we are told houses over 1 million documented Nigerians. SHAME.

About 6 weeks ago, Basketmouth sold out the Wembley SSE Arena with a 12,500 capacity on a colder and drearier Tuesday night. Maybe we should beg Basketmouth to help us run the NFF or plead with Ropo of Cokobar to organize ticket sales for Super Eagles friendlies. He does a great job already on the Entertainment front so why not football? In case our super football administrators in the NFF are sadly unaware, football is entertainment now.  In case they have not signed a 1000-year contract with their current agent, they need a new one as the current one needs to be put to pasture.

Not only was the turnout on Thursday night piss poor, there was no official merchandise to sell. My friends had to buy Barnet FC hats to fend off the cold. A couple of independent smart Caucasian traders were selling Nigeria Super Eagles scarves at affordable rates. Why is it so difficult to get official, licensed merchandise at a Super Eagles friendly? Apparently a fan asked the NFF chairman and he said that replica shirts / jerseys will be available in a few months time. Can you imagine the poverty behind this comment?

The NFF Chairman had something of a one year plan to topple Isa Hayatou as CAF President but we have no plan to sell Super Eagles merchandise until a few months time. Does he realize the gold mine he is sitting on with respect to this merchandise issue?

As an extension to the merchandise issue, there was no match day program. The team I support sometimes prints three 60-page match day programs in a week. Its not rocket science, your skin color can be black and you don’t need too much thinking bandwidth to do it. There is a template that you can modify from time to time, update a few days before your next match, push the button. DONE.

If print edition is too much of a logistics hassle, restrict yourself to the digital edition. It is cheaper and you will make more money because those who can’t attend physically will buy.

As far as I can tell, Thursday’s friendly was bereft of any corporate involvement obviously because NFF has most likely burnt its bridges with many corporate organizations in Nigeria but there are still many looking to get involved if the opportunity is right. For example, The England & Wales FA have several corporate partners. If you go to their website now, you will see some of the players performing media duties (advertisement to you and I) promoting Vauxhall in a subtle way. Many Nigerian corporate organizations with UK/Europe/Diaspora presence or intent will give their right arm to organize an event around this week’s friendly.

But no, we are happy with the estacode. Why should I lift a finger when Daddy government can be black balled to fund our champagne lifestyle.

Its time for our football administrators to wake up. Partner with progressive people in different fields and make a decent fist of our football business. There is a significant commercial opportunity we are leaving untapped.

Ka Chineke Mezie Okwu.

Baba Grumpy works in Financial Services in the United Kingdom. He blogs mostly about football at http://babagrumpy.blogspot.co.uk. His Twitter handle is @BabaGrumpy