Between our president and his wife

In a week that the Buhari government recorded its best achievement so far, our president managed to turn attention way from it. Nothing, absolutely nothing, prepared one for the trauma experienced watching the 21 Chibok girls rescued last week. The girls’ gaunt look and facial expression left me in tears as a father. Seeing the emotion at the thanksgiving service too was a harrowing experience. Whether it was a swap or exchange or money was paid or not, this government wrote its name in gold securing their release. Hopefully, others in the clutches of Boko Haram will be freed soon.

But President Buhari spoilt the mood. His comment on his wife, Aisha, at a session in Germany, was a spoiler. Perhaps he has forgotten that optics matters a lot, particularly on the global scene. What could be more damaging and a foot-in-the-mouth moment than standing with one of the most powerful women in the world and yet proclaiming, oracularly, that your wife’s place is in the kitchen. The glare from Angela Merkel sums it up totally. Was our president briefed about the possibility of such question? How did his media handlers tell him to respond if asked such? Was he fully prepared for the global backlash that has followed the statement?

Quite a lot has been said on the impropriety or otherwise of Mrs. Aisha Buhari’s interview with Naziru Mikailu of the BBC Hausa service but it pales into insignificance with our president’s response. And even when one of his aides, the affable Garba Shehu, attempted a damage control, Buhari stoked the fire more by repeating it when asked to clarify his earlier comments by the German broadcaster, Deutsche Welle. This shows that the president’s earlier comment was not a gaffe, but his view on his wife and her role in his affairs. Of course no two marriages are the same, and so we must be careful analyzing a marriage from afar. But we are talking of our president for goodness sake; whose comments are pointers to his thoughts and actions as a leader.

That’s where the problem lies. Why must the president dignify his wife with a public response if he was unhappy with the original interview? Would he have lost anything by saying whatever happens in our marriage stays indoors or don’t’ worry, we will sort it out? It’s laughable reading comments in defence of his unfortunate comment like the president allowed his wife to go for further studies after their marriage because she possessed only a secondary school certificate, and thereby positioned her better while one of his daughters is a lawyer. Such missed the salient issues left unsaid by the president. One is that his wife has no business in policy issues or governance matters, as she is only suitable for the kitchen. In a region where the girl child enrolment is terribly low and where child marriage is still a major issue, only future will reveal how much setback the president’s comments will cause in the north.

Does this statement also not allude to the way Buhari regards women if he thinks his wife’s position is the kitchen or ‘the other room’? Of greater significance is our economy where he is bound to consider the views of the finance minister? How well does the president regard her advice and thought? What about the other women in the cabinet and the very few he has appointed so far to head some agencies? What does he think of them and their actions?

Some also alluded to the president’s statement of not belonging to anyone and so why must the first lady expect a special treatment or why must her views be sought on political appointments? Those who think like this are missing the fine detail of marriage as only a naïve man thinks his wife has no influence on him, just look back at ancient history and remember how some wars were fought because of women. The other aspect is that Mrs. Buhari is not a novice to power as well; her grandfather was Muhammadu Ribadu, Nigeria’s first defence minister. Evidence abound also in our country how first ladies accessed the spoils of office even without their husband’s knowledge or approval. Which minister or head of an agency can truly stand up to the president’s wife whenever she makes a request?

Our president must remember his words mean a lot and so should be careful of whatever he says. It was President Obama who said, “I’m not naïve, I’ve seen how words can be inadequate in bringing about lasting change. I’ve seen how inadequate my own words have been.” This is hoping our president takes this to heart.